Advent Reflection #1 - The Fire Inside

I'm actually combining my thoughts from the meditation for the First Sunday of Advent and Monday -- as usual I'm running behind!

It's kind of funny that the image I chose for my introductory blog on these reflections was such a frosty, desolate picture of trees. It's winter and yesterday and today were the first snowy days of the season -- it seemed natural to go with that image. Waiting can be lonely and cold and empty. My toes are cold as I write this...

So I open my booklet and what greets me? Images of fire! In the first meditation a quote begins the reading: "Saint John of the Cross in The Living Flame of Love compares our pre-Advent selves to green logs that have been thrown into a fire, the fire of love." But being young and green it takes awhile before we kindle and are lit into a burning flame of passion, whatever than passion might be.

But it's the second meditation that really spoke to me tonight:

The fire inside us comes from the way God made us, namely, to crave the
infinite and to be dissatisfied with everything else until that love is
consummated. Thus, the fire inside us will never be extinguished simply by
attaining the right partner, the right job, the right set of
friends, or the
right recognition. We will always be on fire.

Wow. How true is that? I don't know that I would have ever described it as being on fire, that waiting for those goals I'm hoping to attain -- perhaps some would? For being a "Scorpio," I'm decidedly unlike what that zodiac sign is supposed to be. That passion is not easily identifiable. I try to be easy-going and affable, considerate and open-minded. I try not to let single-mindedness get the better of me.

And yet... and yet, I understand the waiting for that one thing to make my world fall into place. I feel like I'm marking time, heading in the right direction but not making much progress. Perhaps it's not so much a lack of passion (for I do have many goals), but that I'm still that green log that has been thrown into the fire of love?? And what's even more unsettling... once that passion has been kindled within me, I will always be on fire!

Honestly, that's both frightening and exhilarating at the same time! I wonder if I'll be able to sleep tonight with that simmering beneath the surface of my soul?